Comments on: Theres no fence between mine and my neighbours house? How do i say this politely?

By: seven

seven — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 04:28:59 +0000

tell them they have to ask you before using the trampoline, or even better, take it down because your son is too young for it anyway – tell them it broke/or something was loose/dangerous.

get curtains.

there’s really nothing else you can do if they ring your bell. tell them they can’t just walk in your house, set boundaries. remind them your son is napping sometimes so please be quiet. but other than that – there’s not much without making enemies out of your neighbors. this stuff has to be handled right away. and it really is up to the mom to teach her kids manners.
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By: Nascargirl24

Nascargirl24 — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 03:43:59 +0000

You are going to have to nicely talk to the boys and their parents.

When you talk to the boys, tell them that you DO NOT want anyone on that trampoline and it is not safe, because the net is broke right now and they could get hurt on it. Just tell them that they can get hurt and break bones or worse. Just tell them you don’t want anyone to scream at your son through the windows, because sometimes he tries to take a nap during the day (even if he doesn’t) and he won’t go to sleep if he hears them and that he will not go to sleep and he gets cranky and angry if he doesn’t get his sleep.. lol.

I would sit down and talk to the mom and tell her how you feel. You can do it nicely. Just tell her that you don’t like her boys on the trampoline or in your yard when they are not supervised and if they want to come over that you guys can make play dates. She shouldn’t let her 6 and 7 year old run around neighbors’ yards anyways. I would never let my eight year old son do that or even think about going in someone’s yard.

Not trying to be rude, but you have a 19 month old and you shouldn’t be running around naked to grab your clothes, anyways! lol.. If you forget a towel, throw your clothes back on real fast and grab a towel! I know what you are saying though. It is YOUR house and you shouldn’t have to worry about them. But you are going to have to lock the doors and shut the curtains or anyone could see in..

That is cool that they love Aiden, but they need to step back a little bit. And it is their parents fault. It doesn’t matter how close of friends you guys are, they still shouldn’t let their kids do that!

________________________________

Oh, by the way… Can I be your neighbor? I want summertime to be here so bad! We just got over 14 inches of snow and it has been sooooo cold outside!
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Been there, done that with neighbors. My last draw was when they threw and broke my son’s $170 PSP that I had to replace! I don’t let kids come over here like that and I don’t care if I ruin a friendship, because after a WHILE, it gets old! So, I know exactly how you feel!

By: Chris

Chris — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 03:30:59 +0000

A fence will not help. A fence is not a barrier to a 7 year old boy. It is nice that your son has friends. be better the they were closer to the same age but he is learning social skills. Take the trampoline down. I remember when i was young i would go over my neighbors house all the time, just pop over any time saw them outside. They had 5 kids but were about 10 years or so older than me. I learned alot about fixing cars.
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By: browniydgal

browniydgal — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 03:19:59 +0000

I would start by trying to remember to lock the doors, however it is your house and you should not have to change your ways because of your neighbors.

Option 1) The boys are old enough to understand requests and learn manners. One day when they come over, I would sit them down and explain to them that while you love having them over and Aiden enjoys their company… what they are doing wrong, why, and that if they keep doing it you will be forced to talk to their mom and dad about it and/or they will not be able to come over for a bit.

Option 2) Sit the parents down and explain that you love living next to them and you love their kids that you wanted to let them know what was going on, and that you can talk to the kids if they want you to, but you thought you would let them know first and give them the option to talk to them. How being pregnant now there are times when you nap, or you have Aiden napping, or take a shower and their kids come over and in the house when you don’t know it (that you would like to keep the back door open in case they need you for an emergency or something one day). That you are worried about them getting hurt or Aiden getting hurt trying to get to them when you are not around or able to watch them. Also explain that you don’t mind the kids using the trampoline but you would rather the parents or someone be there with them in case something does happen (that should prevent them from calling to Aiden).

Good luck, just remember..if they are good parents and friends they will understand, if not then you don’t need their kids around yours anyways.
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By: Prosey

Prosey — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 02:57:59 +0000

I am not sure that building a fence will deter these bold fellows. I wonder what would happen if you were to tell these kids that they are not allowed to yell into your house from outside. Only tell them ONCE. Next talk to the mom and explain how they are not able to determine if you have put Aiden down for a nap and that you don't want to encourage your son to yell from the window. Explain to your neighbors the rules about using the trampoline. The net is broken so the thing is NOT safe for young children who are unsupervised. I wonder what would hapen if you were to tell the neighbor, "The boys can use the trampoline any time they want as long as she is outside, CLOSE to the trampoline with them." I think that could start a conversation. Or you might mention that you are sorry but the noise from the trampoline is making it impossible for you to keep your own son settled and when he sees the other kids he wants to yell to them or go out with them and you can't always stop and supervise Aiden outside . . . blah blah blah. Bottom line: Your house, your rules. Your neighbor would not tolerate your son when he is age 7 or 8 charging into her house and you should not allow this to go without telling your neighbors your expectations. Some parents have different values than ours and when you don't explain your boundaries you are in essence telling the neighbor that you agree with what is going on. She can't guess and as long as you say nothing she has no reason to think there is anything wrong. It is not too late. You are not just being pregnant-emotional. This is a real matter
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By: adrian<3

adrian<3 — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 02:09:59 +0000

I think you need to establish with these boys’ mother that you don’t want them coming over anymore without permission.

I’ve never been a fan of trampolines. As a paramedic, I’ve seen too many paralyzed kids from trampoline accidents to know that they aren’t safe even with supervision. So, that being said, I definitely wouldn’t want the neighbor’s kids using my trampoline for fear that they could get hurt and you could possibly be sued.

As for them luring your son outside, I think you need to lock your doors and keep the window shut. Having the window open doesn’t make a trampoline any safer.

My point is, these boys need to play in their own yard. Your house isn’t a free for all and you have a right to your privacy. I would simply tell their mother that "You don’t have any problem with her boys coming over to play with Aiden, but that you would appreciate if they would either call and ask first before coming over, or at least come to the door and ask if it would be okay to play."
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By: Cohen's mum back again

Cohen's mum back again — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 01:36:59 +0000

you cna sya ey boys do you mind not yelling for aiden, sometimes im trying to ge thim down for a nap. ill let you know they can play. you can also talk to their parents and say you’d appreicaite if they’d ask before they come and play.

also, why do you even have a cat if you don’t let it in?
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By: Amaretta

Amaretta — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 01:19:59 +0000

Geez — how hard it is to remember to take clothes, a robe or a big towel into the bathroom with you? Seriously, you’re an adult, right? Put a towel bar in the bathroom and hang a towel in there. Or take your bath/shower first thing in the morning or at night when the neighbor kids won’t be around. Set limits for the neighbor kids — they can only jump on the trampoline for two hours in the afternoon (or whenever it’s convenient for you). Keep your doors locked so they can’t just walk right in. This is pretty basic stuff. You need to sit down with the mother and let her know that her kids’ noise has become a problem and the two of you can work out a friendly solution.
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By: Ethel

Ethel — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 01:02:59 +0000

Well, the trampoline is an attractive nuisance (as in it’s your responsibility, and you would be liable if something occurred) and should be put away or expect them coming over. Meanwhile start locking your doors – if he can come in anyone can.
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